It's 4 am here and my eyes are wide open.
Siang tadi pi Rasheed Mall to collect Cik Berry. Before pi sana, Amet dah call orang kedai tu and he just anounce the berita yg kurang menggembirakan. Eventho sebelum ni keep reminding myself to redha dan bersedia menerima apa jua berita tentang Cik Berry, yet I still cant help myself from tears.
However, I cuba sedaya upaya utk bertenang, walaupun sampai takleh tido malam....
(Even masa tulis entry ni pun muka asyik tersebek-sebek)
It's very tough, huh?
Amet reminds me to pray and maybe Allah will make it as kifarah for the very sinful me. And he also said that this is a reminder for us to muhasabah about our rezeki.
Yup, maybe Cik Berry bukan datang dari rezeki yang betul2 halal, who knows? Maybe tanpa disedari Cik Berry dibeli dgn gaji yang dapat bila we went to office but we do nothing except FB-ing and blogging? Or maybe I dapat Cik Berry hasil dari milage claims yg tak betul? Or maybe Cik Berry datang as a so-called "hadiah" from vendor? Or maybe Cik Berry.... oh whatever it is.... I have to accept that Cik Berry will be no longer with me.
And yes, this thing happen, really membuka mata I to betul-betul look into our punca rezeki. I know and I realize I have make a lot of kesilapan dan kesalahan in my life. This really pay me. And I really hope that Allah will forgive me for whatever I have done, and granted us His most Merciful and rezeki yang Halal.
Insya Allah, with Allah's grace n guidance, things will fall through nicely. I have faith in Him.
Well, it's already azan Subuh. Till then.
